JOURNAL 2.

Please share the story of a consumer good you desperately want at some time in your life. 

The consumer good I so desperately crave is a house of my own. I think I want a house so badly because it’s something I’ve never had. Now, of course, I’ve lived in houses before and even called them mine, but since my parents’ divorce, I’ve never felt like I truly had a home.

Having a home of my own would provide me with sanctuary, stability, and independence.

I have had some form of sanctuary in my life before. I’ve always found sanctuary in solitude, whether that be in my bedroom at night, or on a walk by the beach, but the sanctuary of my own home would mean something so different to me. The ability to be and do what I want when I want in my sanctuary is something so appealing to me.

Ever since the age of 7 years, I was passed around from house to house. This made (and continues to make) me feel displaced. Not having a stable home to always come home to, takes a toll. Packing a bag every night, not having something at one location that you may have at another house that you frequent (3 for me). The frustration and stress that comes from a lack of stability is what makes me crave this in a home.

The third reason for desperately wanting a house is that I think it will give me more of a sense of independence. Having my own house would allow me to separate from my dependence from my parents and my grandparents. Paying a mortgage, while to some sounds like a hassle, to me, gives the illusion of working towards individual freedom.

I expect that when I finally do own a house of my own, I will feel a lot of relief. Relief that I will have a place that is just for me (for the most part). Relief that I will finally have a measure of stability in my life as to where I reside. Relief that I am no longer a burden on those around me. Whether or not I feel these feelings when the day comes to fruition, is not important. 

I think the true craving for a house of my own roots from the absence of stressful situations that occur in my life is related to the issue of not having my own home.